Manual to self-love.
We are overloaded by information and great advice about the importance of self-loving, yet we seem to be moving other direction. Away from self, inner peace and deeply satisfying feelings.
Furthermore, our relationship with self is mirrored onto every relationship we have.
What is going on?
We mastered self-care; we are educated, slim, well dressed able to “make” perfect picture.
However this became purpose instead of benefit appearing naturally as a side effect of happy energetic overflow. Where self-love magnetises blessings and opens doors to well-Being and like vibrating people.
So it seems that our super-smart ego took us for a ride. Where we happily convinced ourselves that this is self-loving. But if it was so, would we read about self-love?
All is well, we finished high school now we just need to continue; a bit deeper to the source of life within.
Why?
The Hay House well-being publishers receive 100 000 manuscripts per week. Seems that everybody searches for a piece of good advice, because we as a society, are more depressed, lost and feeling alone.
Leading to 264 million people suffering from depression as reported by the World Health Organisation in January 2020. Mind that this was before Covid-19!
With all self-care and all possibilities, why are we so unhappy? Why is loving self so difficult?
Maybe it is hard to learn something without role models?
Let’s ‘pretend’ that we love this emotional challenge. Where would we start?
Self-awareness, of course. Courage to face and nurture the truth.
Where instead we learnt to shine away from authentic feelings, we create constant chaos so we can excuse emotional confusion. Only that way we can keep running after “needs” of ego.
If we would face our own truth we would do what we love, live with who we adore and befriend like spirited people.
That would be a great ground for devotidly loving self.
Of course goal is to self love completely accepted without self-judgement, however there isn’t lasting shortcut from shame to love; that is too big vibrational jump.
There is some shortcut tho, so keep reading.
Being at peace with self is precondition of lasting ‘underlying everything’ self-love. At least at the beginning. Because we all have experiences of self loving, but states of being are changing. We drop into self-loving, enjoy it for a moment, tho immediately when we feel lower emotions (shame, hate, blame, jealousy..) we disconnect from love. Period.
Im talking about building stable feeling that underlyines everything we do. Let say that judgement or competitiveness states are survival, tension, urge modes….. We are gonna change it.
Can you think of anybody who truly love her/himself this way? Learn from them.
I had always somebody around me with good nature, funny, easily forgiving and letting go, charismatic, brightening the room. This people are low on judgement, they don’t compare, rather they are welcoming humans as whole package. They have deeply rooted values, honesty and loyalty. Playfulness and supper attractive vibes. Polyana style, there are strongly rooted in values and self-actualisation. They say “no” easily.
Some of those traits we have naturally, other we can learn or enhance. Everything we can imagine, we can create. Imagine yourself as this whole package, feel as if its done.
Now my favourite shortcut or addition to previous tips is daily meditation on forgiveness and essence of love.
When I was 26 years old I invested an hour in the morning and in the evening to meditate with this specific focus. In no time, I looked like a little lightbulb! I shined peace and supper warm love. People would ask me to sit next to them:” they would say, you don’t even need to talk to me just please sit next to me for a moment…” I got asked for a date by three boys in two minutes… yes ok I’m trying to inspire you haha
Jokes aside, true is that this essence completely changed my world, I used to be super serious thinker, where now I was super cute, just like little puppy. The doors were opening, I got promoted, needed just three hours of sleep, lost weight and completely stopped drinking vine.
It was a lovely year, then all this love and attention became too much for me, because underneath I still carried shame and other heavy arsenals. That’s why in my experience its great to combine at least this 4 methods;
1)clear your values and enhance true living, gradually rather than radically.
2)use imagination regularly, feel your future self-loving & successful & healthy you.
3)meditate consistently on love, self-love together with forgiveness and healing self-worth, shame, guilt…( I am creating some guided meditations with this topics).
4)connect to source of life within you.
What stands in the way?
