HOW CAN WE HELP YOUTH AND CHILDREN TO FEEL BETTER IN LOCKDOWN?
Maybe first we adults need to find a way how to rest, relax and ADAPT.
What’s so terrible about staying at home?
Could it be that staying at home mean facing self?
We spend so much time, energy and efforts on getting out there and keeping occupied that we managed quite successfully avoid our inner living.
I don’t mean to criticise us all, tho I just read that 97% of families are dysfunctional. Well, mine doesn’t belong into that 3% so I am sort of qualified to theorise about reasons, based on personal experience. Again, I know hehe.
Yes, life can be hard.
Let’s just make it clear that we all do what we can to become our best version and be a good child, friend or parent. We don’t trigger each other on purpose. Well not consciously. Spiritually, it is all orchestrated for learning roots of our triggers, to heal our VULNERABILITY.
Yes being good human doesn’t always bring us wealth, financial or even emotional, yet it does bring us some amount of happiness and peace.
So why it is so hard being good at home, when we are triggered, tired or bored?! Knowledge is power and we, family members, do know each other so well, or at least we know each other triggers and we are not shy to use them. Because the most family dynamic function on hierarchy and power games.
Recently I realised how family members compete for attention, acceptance and comradery. Another survival mode we inherited. So often we compete instead of cooperating or co-create.
Of course, we don’t do it on purpose, we run around to do our best, keep everything as good as possible and then one-day lockdown happens.
Everything stops. Everything but MIND and mindset we nourished for so long.
And then hard becomes suffering for many.
From a satellite view to me it looks like if we were spinning and dancing around to avoid contact with self, with core truth. Lockdown forced us to stop. Suddenly, but surely we were forced to see & feel.
Which had the result that all unprocessed emotions appeared at once.
I work with quantum psychosomatics and I see how facing too many emotions without guidance may become unbearable. Realise that emotions you feel now are intense because you don’t feel anger from today, you feel anger you repressed for decades. Every emotion we didn’t process is stored in our system (body, psyche, energy field). We can learn to process it harmlessly. I see it every day.
It makes me very happy to see how my clients deal with heavy emotions STRATEGICALLY. We practised connecting to the core self, deepest truth and needs. Together we learnt to witness, process and release stored emotions and this is an incredible tool for hard times like we as humanity find ourselves in.
Why not educate about emotions at an early age? Can you imagine the difference in emotional processing?
I find extremely helpful rooting in forgiveness and acceptance, understanding that now especially we are in times when we need to laugh more, especially on our-selves, our need to control or manage, others and self.
We need to let things be and breath more. So what if there are noise and mess, maybe money is tied too. Sometimes saying: “fuck it” helps. Stop trying to be a perfect parent, try to just exist for now.
I know it sounds weird, but when I had really hard times and felt powerless I just said to myself: “shut up, just do what needs to be done and don’t talk”, cause I know I will not say anything I would be proud of. Sometimes we just need to be, that’s it. And you may be surprised how fast you recharge.
The nervous system doesn’t work well if overstretched, so take some supplements too.
Now more than ever people under mental stress need to find a moment to centre, reset and repeat out loud that things will change, that perfect parent, child or opinion does not exist.
We need to remind our selves that we are all in it together and together as humanity we will rise stronger and much more authentic which will bring us deeper satisfaction later on.
REMEMBER, You are not alone.
1)Get supplements for nervous system support
2)Plenty of water, drink, shower, bath with plenty of salt (fastest emotional and energetic cleanser)
3)Talk to children as if you assumed that they are smart enough to understand the challenge of these times. Mainly that it will change soon and now we are all trying to find some positives.
4)If you shouted again, don’t be angry with yourself accept that you are in the extreme challenge, apologies later. Explain that sometimes it’s too much and then you lose it but you love them. It’s great education for the future, this is how the real world works. We sometimes react and we can apologise. Usually, 5:1 ratio (positive: negative behaviour) will restore balance.
5)Remember that we all need time and space to process things.
6)Take care of yourself first-empty energy tank can’t function at its best.
7)Find a way to breathe (stop, even three slow deep breath regularly, will do miracles to your brain oxygen levels which increases clarity and calmness). Period.
8)Watch comedy instead of crime — that’s creating more adrenaline. Still, don’t force it on anybody especially teenagers, some research shows that anger can be processed via watching violence. Try to remember that hormones are making monsters from all of us. Oh yeah, not you?
9)Dance, shake that nice ass of yours!
10)The angriest people watch the news, conspiracy theories, internet info is much better regulated for keeping informed. If you can help somebody do so if you can do something practically do so, then pay attention to yourself and those you love. Every negative thought is adding to world tension. Statistics show that people watching the news in the morning suffer 40% more on depression than those who watch in the evening. I don’t watch for 15 years, yet I am informed sufficiently.
11)Video calls with friends, even while cooking is great! Try to laugh between complaining. Both help up to point. Learn to feel when you going into rabbit hall and stop. I let people complain up to point when I notice that I stop paying attention, then I simply change the topic. Communication serves two people.
11)Faith is one of the most powerful antidepressants… God, universe, love or nature, it doesn’t matter what it deepens up your connection.
YOU ARE NOT A L O N E, if you feel down tell somebody directly, do not do hints. Be clear, authentic and bold, the world is full of people who give support for free. Believe and you will find.
You aren’t alone. We are in it together.
